> KARATE CHOP THE BRANCH

You Karate chop the branch. It creeks, before the whole tree bends down. You shift slightly as the entire Aspen tree catapults you back into the Treehouse and through the roof.

> ESTIMATE DISTANCE TO THE GROUND

You try to estimate the distance to the ground. You estimate that it is close and getting closer. You fall painfully onto the ground. Lugagge coughs something up into your afro.

You are in an aspen forest where all trees look alike. Obvious exits are North, West, South, East.

>

Close eyes, spin around until dizzy, go whatever direction I'm facing

Check afro

> CHECK AFRO

You check your afro. You feel what appears to be a Unicorn horn stuck stranded in the middle of your afro.

> CLOSE EYES, SPIN AROUND UNTIL DIZZY, GO WHATEVER DIRECTION I'M FACING

You start spinning until you're dizzy. When you stop you stagger off into a tree before heading down the NORTH path.

You are in a forest where every tree looks the same. There is a chest in the middle of the road. Obvious exits are North, West, East, South.

>

Poke the chest

> POKE THE CHEST

You poke the chest. It has been poked. It would poke you back, but the internet connection it uses blocks Flankbook.

>

>Examine Chest

> EXAMINE CHEST

You feel down your chest. It appears to be completely fuzzy and whole. You then realize that there is another chest sitting next to you and decide to examine it. It is an old wooden chest with elaborate but worn carvings. There does not appear to be a lock on it.

>

>Open WOODEN chest.

> OPEN WOODEN CHEST

You slowly open the chest. It creaks as a jingle comes from inside it. Inside the chest you find a tattered pony doll with polka-dotted pants, rope for mane and tail, and two button eyes one of which is loose. Beside it you find a squeeze bottle of gravy.

>

Hug the doll.

Collect contents of the open wooden chest into the thongventory

> HUG THE DOLL

You hug the doll. It squeaks. You feel as if you have awoken something.

> COLLECT CONTENTS OF CHEST

You store the doll and the squeeze bottle of gravy. After all, you'll never know when you get the hankering for a gravy-covered stuffed doll for a snack.

>

>Head North by Northeast

Head Norse

>HEAD NORTH BY NORTHEAST

You head off the road North by North-East. After a time of wandering you run into a tree. Dizzy, Luggage growling you feel a trickle of something warm and sticky slide down your face. You have no idea which direction you came from.

> HEAD NORSE

You imagine yourself in a raid on Anglo-Saxon England. Your battle cry shouts to the heavens. You return to reality when you hear a slight dripping noise and you realize that you don't know where Anglo-Saxon England is.

>

Loot the warm, sticky stuff on my face

> LOOT THE WARM, STICKY STUFF ON FACE

You loot the warm sticky stuff on your face. Or rather, you attempt to. Looking at your hooves it seems that you are bleeding, and investigaging it seems to be coming from a puncture wound on your cranium caused by the Unicorn horn that you had previously left unlooted but floating freely in your hair. Your face now has several tracts of blood going down it, and it is dripping on the ground. Your hooves are very bloody. Luggage appears to be licking one of the tracts of blood. You have a craving for Sushi.

>

Rub the Unicorn horn to cure my Tetanus.

use luggage to clean myself

*vigorously

> VIGOROUSLY RUB THE UNICORN HORN TO CURE TETANUS

You vigorously rub the Unicorn horn. It would normally cure any diseases such as TETANUS and AIDS, all this unicorn horn does is shoot magic painfully into your wound. Blood spurts from the wound dousing a nearby spontaneity fire nearby. Good thing you're not sick or you might have passed out.

> USE LUGGAGE TO CLEAN SELF

You use your evil pet bag to clean yourself. While doing this your stomach starts to contract and you feel slightly dizzy. You're not entirely sure what's going on. The mixture of the wound having magic shot into it and the contractions cause you to pass out. When you wake up you find a young green Alicorn snuggling next to you. You don't appear to be fat anymore.

>

Loot the Alicorn

>Use tree branches to make a crucifix.

*Facehoof*